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Week 2!
Ms. Perfection... hmmm... do I know her? Why yes! Have I tried to be her? Yes! Do I still struggle with trying to be her? Yes! Do I know better than to try and be her? Yes! Did this chapter slap me in the face? YES! Can you believe that even after reading the chapter, I have lamented over writing the perfect post on Ms. Perfection? How crazy is that!
"About halfway through the service, I looked down at my crisp, clean white linen skirt. That’s when I noticed a glaring flaw in the plan. Right down the middle of my skirt, stretching from my left side to my right, was a bright, royal blue pen mark smiling back at me. Horrified at what I saw, I realized the only way to remove the stain was to take it to the dry cleaners. I couldn’t believe that after all my stressing and striving, the look I wanted to achieve that Easter morning was ruined with a mark from my son’s pen. So much for perfection, I thought."
After reading Lisa's description of Easter Sunday, getting everyone dressed in their matchy matchy outfits, Lisa admiring how pretty she looked, and then the horror of seeing the pen mark down her crisp white skirt - I recalled a photo that was taken of me and Jim for our church directory several years ago. I spent time finding the perfect outfits for us to wear. I did my hair, makeup, found the perfect accessories... we were going to have the most beautiful church directory portrait. Imagine my surprise when I previewed the photo... everything was in place. Hair - perfect, clothing - perfect. Nailpolish - oops... big chip in the nail polish for all to see! What a reminder! I looked so put together, but that tiny chip (that looked huge to me) reminded me of my imperfection. No matter how hard I tried, I was not ever going to be perfect. I can put a bow on the package, but what's inside is broken. Like the Christmas gift we received one year... it was beautifully wrapped. But when I picked the package up the unmistakeable sound of broken glass sounded from inside the package. It was so pretty on the outside, but broken on the inside. Trying to cover up my imperfection with makeup and nice clothes... well that's like trying to put a band aid on a gunshot wound. It's just not going to work.
Over the years I have learned to be real with people. I reflected on the question Lisa asked in the Bible Study section of the book:
"Search your heart. Is it more important for you to be seen as perfect in a certain area.. or seen as real?"
Lord, I want to be real. I am so glad that what you desire from me is to be real, not perfect.
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